Tagged: Fred Lewis

As I attempt another Fred Lewis Joke…

About two weeks ago

I was working in the Box Office at one of Second City’s studio theatres.  It was a slow night, so I was doing the only thing a diligent employee would do.  I was listening to the Yankees game on MLB Radio and checking my Facebook page.  I write this freely knowing that my boss doesn’t read my blog.  I’ve decided to openly taunt him now.


On one of my many visits back to Facebook (aka the Social Media enslaver), a wall post popped up from my friend George.  You see, he was apparently watching the Yankees Game on YES.  This was an impressive fete within and of itself because he lives in Chicago. I figure he was visiting New York or watching the game on satellite.  Anywho, on one of the station breaks, he saw me on a YES Network commercial!  Apparently they used some of the shots off my page for the latest advertisement they’re running.  Am I getting paid?  No (but why would that be a shocker).  Is it awesome?  Absolutely, considering this all began as a revenge blog against a guy (and ex-Yankee fan) who had done me wrong.


Also about two weeks ago

Hideki Irabu resurfaced with a DUI.  Hideki Irabu, you are a glorified car crash (all puns intended).


Speaking of embarrassing Fat Toads

It’s hard to look back at that period in Yankee history, the end of a dynasty.  The mid-Aughts could best be described as a period of “delicate” personalities, personal trainers and a complete loss of the definition of teammate.   (Carl Pavano?  Anyone?)


For the kids who don’t remember, this was a time when the Yankees refused to catch on to the Sabermetrics movement.  They acted less like the tough jock on the block and more like your grandpa who still insisted that television was a passing fad.  


Looking back at last year’s championship team, it’s easy to see why they won. As opposed to those brittle out-of-date rosters of the mid-Aughts, most of these guys were quiet work horses.  No big boppers (except for the obvious).  No real baggage (except for the obvious). Girardi set up a team first clubhouse, not much different than Torre’s 1996 Yankees.


Speaking of looking back

I am missing my ten year college reunion this week.  Wow, has it been ten years?  Even worse, has it really been ten years since the Subway Series?  As lopsided and sloppy as that series was, and by god it was (I’m looking at you, Timo Perez), it was by far the most fun.  Any series that includes Turk Wendell smack talk and a flooded club house is begging to be the next installment in the “Major League” franchise. 


Where’s Cerrano when you need him?


Well, I can at least tell you where I was

I was stuck in Arkansas doing a show (and I use the word “stuck” because I refuse to believe that anyone voluntarily does anything in Arkansas) during the series. I distinctly remember a local sportscaster saying, “Well, it’s New York’s world.  We’re just playing in it.”  In a way, aint he right?


That was so douchey of me. : )



And to conclude in Douchey fashion…

The Yankees lost to the Jays today (3 to 2 in 14 innings).  It only goes to show, Fred Lewis is going to haunt me for the rest of the year because I didn’t draft him…or at least haunt me until he has to go back to work for tax season.


Fred Lewis joke! Wooo!


Thoughts on this week (The Yanks, Ernie and why can’t Fred Lewis do my taxes?)

Tonight’s Yankees Game

Bases Loaded, no one out… the Yanks push across two runs.  Derek Jeter steps up to bat and scorches what is certain to be the go-ahead run; however, a certain Mr. Ordonez chillin’ in the outfield didn’t quite get the memo.  He was a steel trap.  Unfriggenbelievable!  Did you see that play?! I am absolutely sure that I broke a blood vessel and woke up half of Staten Island. 


I hate to say it but the Yanks are bit beat up right now.   New York Yankees meet the New York Mets.  They’re old hats at this injury thing.  You might be able to take a lesson from them. (Shudder)


Seriously, tomorrow is a night game. Rest up boys.  You have three more games in the Motor City and Johnny Damon is not going away.


I’m home this week for a vacation, so I actually got to watch the Yankees on the YES Network.  Holy Jesus!  The YES Network easily employs some of the most half-assed announcers in Major League Baseball.   Jeez! Michael Kay, what game are you watching?  Did anyone hear him say that the Yankees won 4 to 5 after the final out?  Even better, how did Sergio Mitre give the Yanks what they needed?  He went 4 lousy innings and gave up 4 runs!


Nonetheless, listening to Michael Kay is still easier than listening to Joe Morgan.


Thoughts on this week

On Friday Night, I saw my first live American League game in… Ugh, God knows when.  It’s embarrasing.  Anyways, I saw the White Sox vs. Toronto at the Cell.  It was a pretty interesting pitching duel that ended in extra innings. Normally, this would be pretty cool, but it was 40 degrees that night.   40 Degrees! It’s May, Chicago! Come on!  (Come to think of it, there’s a word play/weather joke here but I’m still nursing that broken blood vessel to think it out.)


No doubt about it, my heart belongs to the American League.  Those were the teams I was born and raised on, BUT there’s something to be said for the excitement of National League “small ball.”  The game just looks more strategic and elegant when you’re not slugging it out.


And FYI:  Fred Lewis is easily the most Accountant-sounding player name in all of Major League Baseball.


And speaking of the Tigers…

Last week we lost one of the great announcers in Baseball, Ernie Harwell.  With the loss of Harwell (and Harry Kalas last year), I’m reminded of what a dying art calling a baseball game can be.  When I graduated Fordham University, Vin Scully was our commencement speaker.  First, how cool is that?!  Second, talk about the personification of elegance.  Now, when my name was called to get my diploma, if I only could have gotten him to say…”Now batting…”